Finding Pants

Brenden just left to drive the missionaries to our church building for something. I didn't really catch what he was saying because I was in the shower getting ready to go shopping. As soon as Brenden gets back home we're heading out to the mall to go shopping. For clothing. For me.

I hate shopping for clothes for myself. Despise it. I hate clothing and fashion and malls and new Fall catalogues and the way brands market their clothing lines for winter. No one can possibly be that happy in that much snow. I don't care how cute that matching hat and scarf set is. That smile is FAKE!

Right, so anyway, shopping. I suspect a lot of women would be excited to have their husbands take them shopping. I don't actually know. I definitely appreciate Brenden for wanting to take me shopping. My goodness, he knows how unpleasant I am when looking for clothes. Why would he willingly put himself through that?

It's not that I hate all shopping. It's just that I don't want to buy myself another pair of pants when I already have eight pairs (is that a lot or too little?) Sure, they don't fit me as well as they should (too big or too small- I don't know why! They fit when I bought them.) And, yes, it's true I often complain when getting ready in the morning because of this fact. (It was actually because of this complaining that Brenden demanded that we go and buy me a new pair of jeans today.) But pants are expensive! Clothing is expensive! And I'm too short so all the pants in the store are too long for me. ALL OF THEM. And I hate having to get my pants hemmed because I don't sew which usually means that my pants will stay too long and I will wear them anyway and then they will get all torn up where my shoes step on them. And shirts? Shirts are just annoying. There are so many different designs! Button up, v-neck, crew neck, scoop neck, long sleeve, three-quarter sleeve, cap sleeve, tank top, regular t-shirt, sheer, silk, cotton. I generally stick to t-shirts because they're pretty simple and I would get them for free for going to special events. (Too bad I can't wear my old softball t-shirt to church!)

Like I said, I don't hate all shopping. I love shopping for kitchen gadgets. I like shopping for furniture. I like buying books and art supplies. And I enjoy shopping for others. I even enjoy shopping for clothing for others. I just can't stand having to pick out clothes for myself.

Can I show you something that would be embarrassing if I actually cared?
This is a picture of some of the items in my closet:

This is hardly the entire contents of my closet but I wanted to share these items because it gives you a little insight to my shopping habits. I hate shopping for myself so much that when I go shopping, if I find one thing I like or doesn't look too bad on me, I basically buy it in bulk so I won't have to go shopping again for a long time.

Here I have 7 of the same polos from American Eagle, 5 of the same long-sleeved t-shirts from PacSun, 4 of the same blouses from Macy's, 3 of the same (only 2 pictured) skirts from Macy's, also not pictured: 3 pairs of the same jeans, 2 pairs of the same corduroys, 2 pairs of the same flats, and 5 pairs of the same flip flops. There are a few things these items had in common when I was shopping: 1) They fit me. 2) They came in different colors. 3) They were on sale for super cheap. And those are my basic requirements for buying clothes in bulk.

(The rest of this post was added after my shopping trip with Brenden.)

Because Brenden and I had a Macy's gift card and very little time to shop, our shopping trip was limited to one department store. Generally, when I go shopping for myself, it is because I need a particular item of clothing. I went into Macy's looking for a pair of jeans that fit well and weren't at risk of having holes suddenly torn in embarrassing places (I have two pairs of blue jeans, one of which I've had since seventh grade. It was my best Gap buy ever; unfortunately, the pants are now very worn and thin and at risk of having holes suddenly torn in embarrassing places.) Very much to my relief, there were a ton of jeans ON SALE and I began grabbing pairs off the racks and shelves and handing them to Brenden. After I had about seven pairs to try on, I headed to the dreaded dressing room and began trying them on.

Here is one thing I hate about women's clothing: how much the sizes in different brands vary. I tried on a pair of pants that were size 5 and they were too small, then I tried on a 7 from the same brand and they were still too small. If I tried on a size 9 in this same brand, I would have to hem the pants at the knee, thereby ruining the boot cut, so they'd be short enough for me to wear. Needless to say, I gave up at the 7. But then I tried on a size 3 S (s for short) in another brand and they fit. And I didn't need to hem them. And I shook my fist at the size 7 on its hanger in my dressing room and said, "I liked you better! You were $10 cheaper but you failed me!" And I went to the counter, paid for the jeans, and left confused about what size I actually wear because, apparently, I'm anywhere between a 3 and a 9.

It doesn't matter too much, though, because I just bought a new pair of jeans which means I won't need to go jeans shopping for another ten years.